Friday, March 2, 2012

The Best Laid Plans, or, I Almost Die (Again)

This week I had *planned* to be missing from my usual internet haunts, namely to supervise and of course if necessary ASSIST in the counter-top remodel of aught twenty twelver.

And then...

Like a hurricane buffeting a tiny, unprepared atoll, Your Favorite Writer was decimated by Hurricane Stomach Virus.

I'm not talking 'oh, grab me the tums' stomach virus, I'm talking 48 hours of such violent sickness I almost called 911. Why? Well since the doctor had said that if I couldn't keep water down by evening I'd be heading to the ER ANYway, I wanted to go fast and in something that could be hosed out. Also, something I didn't OWN.

Luckily for me, and whatever EMT workers were on duty, the medicine that the doctor called in put me in just enough of a coma that I was able to drink some liquid before I passed out.

It's been about five days and TODAY was the first day that I had real breakfast, as opposed to two bites of a banana. This thing was so intense, I was pretty sure death was imminent.

As I lay dying on the bathroom floor, I thought mainly of song lyrics I couldn't get out of my head, and how much laundry would go unfinished.

Rest assured, diligent readers, the laundry is close to caught up, the song has moved on to presumably other heads and I am also pretty sure that 'As I lay dying' is a band name. Your Favorite Writer is back on deck, supervising the as-yet-unfinished counters AND is spray tanned, as you'd expect.

The counters though, now THOSE things had better get to drying. Life is short, I have no time for slow drying concrete.

Comments, questions, had any plague lately?