Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Blathering on About Nothing in Particular

I'm stuck home today, which, don't get me wrong, I'm rather happy about. Mainly because I get extra coffee. Now that I cold brew my coffee, I can actually drink it again. This is so full of the YAY! that I can't even tell you. I get a little, oh, homicidal, it turns out, having to drink only water and/or milk.

(Apparently I just can't LIVE on caffeinated drinks. Pity.)

I'm stuck home because of what they are adorably calling "Stormaggedon" - see, isn't that cute? No. We already have a bunch of solid ice on everything stationary outside, and are expecting what they're (again adorably) calling "round 2" later today. More ice. Then snow. Then power-line snapping winds! And the weather people on tv are all pyschotically excited about it, because let's face it, unless there's a blizzard or tornado coming, we'd all really rather watch the Sports segment.

Everyone's basically been all "the storm's coming, hurry get thee to WalMart for bananas!" but because I planned ahead, I got myself to NOT WalMart and bought my own canned fruit and goods. Nothing is worse than finally emerging after a "storm event" with scurvy because you only stocked up on toilet paper and potatoes.

Then I *would* be a dirty pirate!

I'm also plotting my escape from this ridiculous state that finds such weather acceptable. My BFFIC claims I'd really like the weather there. I'd pretty much like anywhere that the sun is visible at this point. I can't just run off though because they'll probably close the roads unless you're an emergency vehicle. (That's why I'm planning to modify the dirty American SUV with a flashing light and Casanova makes *excellent* siren noises....)

But other than bracing myself for possible power outages and stocking up on emergency candles and firewood, I've also downloaded some meditation podcasts. I know! I usually fall asleep whenever I try to meditate on my own, that and/or get lost in my thoughts and end up reminding myself to call and complain about the Macy's crystal department.

True story: for Christmas, my grandpa send me a Waterford crystal bowl. Macy's screwed up and sent me a duplicate bowl. I am going to return the extra bowl to our local store. My grandpa, meanwhile, picked out some glasses he wanted to add to my set and had them mail it to me. I received a package from "Brain Firehammer" of the Macy's out in Virginia. I opened the box to find two glasses....in a four glass set. I'm also pretty sure that Brain Firehammer isn't a real person. I called the number on the return address label and finally got connected with customer service. The lady assured me a manager would call me back....so far? Nothing from Macy's OR their star performer, Mr. Brain Firehammer.

So.

Now I'm going to do guided meditation so I can follow directions and not end up having imaginary conversations with Mr. Firehammer. I'll still probably fall asleep. I have a cold. I fall asleep when I have colds. We'll all hope for the best.

Well, this laundry isn't going to do itself and the floor won't be steam-mop-able if we lose power (the humanity!) and I've been in my cocktail-adorned pajamas since 6:30 am so I'd really better get this party started. I'll let you know how Snowmaggedon goes.

Comments, questions, are you in a blizzard?

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