Monday, January 25, 2010

Swimming in a sea of Lysol

I know, you're all groaning and pounding your fists impotently on your desks, "why, WHY do we have to read another sick post!?" Well, you don't have to read anything, but I do feel compelled to blog about it, at least a bit. Mainly because I am confused.

I took several biology classes, some at the college level, and I was pretty sure I understood the basic gist of the virus. You get it, you defeat it, you recognize it next time. Right? I mean, that's the whole POINT of immunizations! (Hello, I did NOT go to the H1N1 vaccine party for the great company.)

Imagine my surprise when about four days after Princess' Midnight Vomit Party (Part I) I was awakened Saturday night to the Midnight Vomit Party Part II! I mean, I am not kidding when I say that I did everything short of set the house on FIRE to rid it of germs. I boiled her linens, bleached all the hard surfaces....what did I miss? Again, pretty sure if she had a virus the first time, how the hell did we end up with Virus the Sequel?

I guess I'm just residually cranky from having to change bedding several times at 3 in the am (until I realized throwing some large towels down would be faaaar more efficient).

Seriously though, what gives? I'm not taking any chances this time; I bought a ten-pound can of vanilla scented Lysol - and it promises to kill 99.9% of ALL viruses. That's right you virus asshole, you're going down. Sure, I've given myself an asthma attack, and I can no longer think of "vanilla" without thinking "vomit" but we're not messing around.

I'm tired of encountering THIS in the wee hours of the morn:

And it's way too late at night to dial up a Jesuit. That's why I have Lysol.

On a totally non-vomit related note (sighs of relief ensue), my FAVORITE team made it to THE SUPERBOWL! I mean, I don't want to name names, but MY team didn't have to hack (illegally) at Brett Favre's legs to get there. Eh, eh? Get it?

That should help. Oh and that awesome 5 billion LED light lives in our house because The Man spent about 26 hours and half his artistic ability making it. Yeah. I know. It's pretty kick ass.

Comments, questions, what's your favorite lysol scent?