Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Nail glue and birthday wishes

I only have mere minutes today chicadees - you see, I just glued my very classy fake nails on and it's making it hella-hard to type and Princess is whining and I have to getherasnackrightnow! and The Destroyer will wake up any second and I have to paint my leaves. Get all that? Make sense? I thought not.

See, today I pulled my box labeled 'Skinny Jeans' from the top of the closet, where it waits like the Holy Grail to be discovered by the righteous - or Indiana Jones. Whichever. Yet today, I tried on the six PAIRS of jeans and THREE now fit! THREE! I am making progress. So, when I trudged off to Wally World I bought myself some cheap fake nails and glue. This is how I celebrate my thinner thighs, world, with a $5 home manicure!

Don't laugh bitches. I get people asking where I get them done. And when Mommy is tired of inadvertently poking herself in the eye? I pop them off and that's that. Classy!

Of course this post has taken ten years to type and all, but you can't put a price on style. Or self rewarding. I also bought some Doritos, but I don't wanna talk about it....

On a different note, The Destroyer's birthday is tomorrow, and the T-Day leaf cupcake project of doom isn't going to make itself. Plus, Princess is hungry and my nails are tired.

Comment, questions, huffing any nail glue?

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