Monday, October 19, 2009

Mommy's safe place

Last week in my parenting Buddhist! class, we learned about the idea of a 'safe place.' A safe place is emphatically NOT a time out. See, we already learned that time out is, at best, useless (which I did NOT need a book to tell me) and at worst, sort of a douche-y parenting tactic. A safe place is a place the kid in question can go and chill out and get all Buddhist! mellowed out. In theory, my 4 year old LOVED the idea; she decided her safe place would be in her room, and we'd use her fuzzy princess chair. Sweet! Then, in practice, she told me that she HATES her safe place, and has actually punched her chair. Someone needs a happier safe place. Like Mommy.

Mommy needs a safe place, capice?

I talked with my Biff the other day (bff - best friend forever, now shortened to Biff, by me. You're welcome.) about this. She said that her safe place is her closet. It's away from her kids and she can shut not just one, but two doors. What a coincidence! My safe place is now also in MY closet!!! I can lock the bathroom door and then shut the closet door and they cannot. get. in. I have clothes in there, access to a toilet - hell, I have electrical outlets AND a freaking phone jack in there! I could rig up a mini-fridge and never, ever, come out.

It's a panic room. You know. For Mommy.

Because honestly, if you are a parent and you don't need a safe place, maybe you're already Buddhist doing better than the rest of us.

Comments, questions, where do you hide?

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